Last night, Danielle, the kids, and I, went to Mazzio's with Amanda and Barrett. Olivia also had gymnastics but I just read my Madonna book. Anyway, Mazzio's, as I believe I have talked about in a previous post, is a pizza buffet. They have dessert on the bar, too. Which I had. Even though I had dessert, I went to the grocery store to buy ice cream for me and Danielle. The Biggest Loser was on, and it is "our thing" to eat ice cream, sitting on our butts on the couch, while we watch morbidly obese people kill themselves to lose weight. So I went out to pick up our ice cream, and I had quite the misadventure at the local Kroger.
On my way over, to set the tone for the absurdity of the events that were to follow, I was listening to Richard Cheese. He covers songs, like Baby Got Back, but they are all sung like Big Band songs or something. Its silly. I had them because Danielle mistakenly burned them onto the CD of Spongebob songs she made me to let the kids listen to on the way to and from school.
My friend Alisa once told me a piece of advice that her mother shared with her and her sister. When you're single, no matter where you're going, if you're leaving the house, you have to look your best, even just to the grocery store. You never know when or where you can meet someone, so... Usually I just go around looking like crap, but last night I looked pretty good. I was wearing a turquoise t-shirt with fuschia and like neon yellow or green designs. It is just a t-shirt from Disney from The Tower of Terror ride, but it looked cute with the rest of the ensemble. White shorts, flashy, silver Ed Hardy sneakers, sapphire blue eyeglasses, and a big hackin' rhinestone encrusted cocktail ring in the shape of Jesus' head, the crown jewel of my accessory collection, purchased at my favorite store, Popmart. Like I said, I looked too cute. Danielle requested Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream, and it turned out they were Buy One, Get one, so I also picked out Black Walnut. It seemed like a good idea, I like Butter Pecan ice cream, and I like walnuts. When I got home and we tasted Black Walnut ice cream, tho, we weren't too keen on it. But I didn't get home yet, I still have to have some awkard encounters go down and my earth-shattering revelation. See, foreshadowing, this blog has it all. I went to the Customer Service Desk and the woman working there was so rude to me! I have never been treated like that by someone working the courtesy desk, hello? its the courtesy desk! She told me I had to check out at a register, which fine, but you don't have to snap at me. So I went to the register and the cashier and bagger were talking to me, and they were laying it on real thick about oh, nice choice of ice cream there, and oooh its buy one, get one. Especially the bagger. I guess they were just being polite but it was just weird. And the last time this happened to me, I was at Wal*Mart, and it turned out the cashier was flirting. Haha. The cashier at Kroger was a woman, so I doubt she was, but the bagger was a boy, although he looked like he was maybe twelve, and may or may not have been gay, and even if he was, he wasn't necessarily coming on to me, who knows. Anyway. Somehow it came out that I was from Pennsylvania, and this bag boy asked if i was visiting family or something. I said I had actually just moved here, not that it was any of his business, I didn't say that part haha, but ya know. He proceeded to congratulate me, its a nice city to live! Um, thanks. On my way out, I see my reflection in the sliding glass doors. My show-stopper of an outfit stopped me dead in my tracks, because of the one accessory I was sporting that I didn't realize I had on. Earlier in the evening before he went to bed, Jacob gifted me with a lovely Thomas the Tank Engine sticker, which he stuck on my shirt. I felt so dumb, like the biggest loser ever. The End.
xoxo, Travvy
No comments:
Post a Comment